Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My other half...

A few years ago I met a man on a DB on the internet.  It started out as just someone to talk to, neither one of us had any intentions other than talking.  We went from emailing and IM'ing all day to talking for hours on the phone.  The problem was he was in Texas and me in NC.  We met half way a few times, but long-distance relationships are so hard.  Add to that the fact that he was having a mid-life crisis and it was a disaster waiting to happen.  He decided to leave Texas.  I tried with everything that I had to get him to move here.  He had just come out of a 20 year marriage that ended badly.  I really think he was scared to let me make him happy.  It kind of fell apart from there.  We still talk from time to time, but he married someone else.  I was so hurt when he told me that.  He has told me that he really did love me and he realized what a mistake he made.  He truly was my other half.  He understood me better than anyone.  He was my best friend and I loved (love) him with all my heart.
I'm listening to VH1 while studying for a test and this song comes on...two is better than one.  It is by Boys like girls and Taylor Swift.  I'm listening to it and just bust out crying.  It hits me like that from time to time and it happened a few years ago.  My question is how do you get past that?  How do you keep going when you know you have already had the love of your life and it's gone?  How do I get rid of the pit I get in my stomach every time I hear a ballad that relates?  It really feels like half of me is gone.  How do you get over your soul mate?

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